Saturday, December 18, 2010

Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.

Dear friends,

When Jesus came down from the mountainside, large crowds followed him. A man with leprosy came and knelt before him and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.” Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!” Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy. – Matthew 8:1-3

Rather than share all that has happened since the last email, and a lot has happened, I’ll just fast forward to today and share how we’re feeling. The last few days have been bumpy for Madeline, mostly we feel due to people not paying good enough attention to her. When things are done that finally solve her woes, Lisa and I are like, “Exactly! They should have done that sooner, we knew it needed to be done”. It’s a fine line to be an advocate for Madeline while not feeling like you are stepping on the toes of highly trained medical professionals.

The doctors have seemed weird lately, their tone with us has shifted to a more hopeless outlook. They look at us to see if we’re ok and say things like “are you sure you want to go through with this?” I understand that medically there is nothing that can be done for Madeline right now, but that is a far cry from a hopeless situation. She is not a vegetable. When I hang out with her, she is completely fine, she looks at me and knows me, I can make her smile and Lisa can make her laugh. She has people she likes and people she doesn’t like, she totally has a personality.

So I don’t understand why the doctors feel this way. I don’t know if there is something they are not telling me. I don’t want to stick my head in the sand, I understand her heart and lung condition very well. All that needs to happen is for the holes in her heart to close, the left ventricle to grow bigger, and her lungs to heal and then we’re outta here. So why are they acting like there’s no hope?

Do they not understand God? If He is willing, He will heal Madeline. If He is willing, He will take Madeline to be with him and the angels in heaven. In the meantime, as long as she is comfortable and happy and has a personality, we should wait on the Lord. I remember when we first found out about her condition and the first option presented to us was to abort (but not as in abort on your computer, we’re talking about taking a life). Absolutely not! Is that what the world thinks we should do?

I felt like that was a trap from Satan, the great tempter, “Here’s a way out, disobey God, and things will get easier for you. Take, eat the fruit.” I feel the same way now, like we are being offered a way out, a way to no longer have to deal with Madeline anymore. As a father, I could never do that. As a Christian, I have learned to not disobey God and to wait on Him for deliverance. And that is exactly what we’re going to do.

Some of you have sent us messages reminding us of why we’re here and what we should be learning from this (thanks JDW & LLJ!!), and I thank you for that encouragement. We want to thank you all again for your prayers, help, care, support, gifts, generosity and kove for Madeline Grace. Please continue to pray for Madeline’s Miracle this Christmas day as we anticipate and celebrate the birth of Jesus, the greatest miracle and gift ever given, from God to man.

Shanker & Lisa.

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