Sunday, April 3, 2011

To My Dearest Daughter

Dear Madeline,

How are you doing? I hope things are well for you in heaven. I haven't written to you before but I do hope that God passed along all my prayers for you.

It snowed today. It was unexpected, but it came down and covered everything in white. The landscape looked much like it did the day we buried your body, calm and peaceful. I got some silicone bracelets with your name on it, I was hoping it would be something to always help me remember you. They came out looking pretty bad, I'll have to change it up a bit, maybe the next ones will look better.

Today we rented and watched Tangled, Disney's new interpretation on Rapunzel. It was a lovely and sweet story and your sisters loved it a lot. In the story, a princess is born and she has magical hair. A mean old woman who wanted the hair's magical power for herself stole Rapunzel away from her parents and hid her in a castle. Each year on Rapunzel's birthday, the king and queen would let a latern fly into the night sky in the hopes that someday their daughter would see it and return home. This had become an affair for the whole kingdom each year as they let thousands of lanterns fly into the night sky for Rapunzel.

Rapunzel, locked away in her tower, had always seen the lights on her birthday, but didn't know they were for her, but she longed to go and see them up close. There's a scene in the movie where the king and queen, all dressed up, get ready to let another lantern loose on Rapunzel's birthday.

I really felt like that king. I felt, like him, that my daughter had been taken away from me too soon, and each day I long to have you back. I send up prayers instead of lanterns, and like the kingdom in the movie, much of the kingdom here on earth also sends up prayers too...all of them for you. I hope you see their light. I hope it reminds you of me and your mother and your sisters here on earth. We all miss you so much.

I suppose though, that you won't be coming back to us. I look forward to that day, when we'll come up to meet you and be a family again. I want to hold you so much.


p.s. your younger brother is doing well and we look forward to his birth. Your mom and I hadn't really settled on a name yet but your sisters all think he will be called Max.

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